Adam ChristingIn many companies, performance reviews are stressful for both employees and managers. But they don’t have to be. A growing body of research shows that one overlooked soft skill can transform these conversations: humour. Done right, positive, affirming humour breaks tension, builds connection, and makes colleagues more open to feedback.
Nikki Sneed, a strategist with RevPartners (RP), said: “I’ve always made it a point to try to laugh with my partners at RP. If people feel comfortable enough to laugh with you, they’ll feel much more comfortable taking your suggestions and strategy.”
Laughter isn’t a gimmick. It’s a leadership tool that can repair the old model of critique-based reviews. When managers use laughter with intention, it helps turn dreaded reviews into authentic growth conversations. Warning: not all types of humour work in this setting! Sarcasm or insulting humor can backfire. Remember the “golden rule” of positive laughter: “If in doubt…leave it out.” The goal is laughing with, not at your people.
Learn Their “Laugh Languages”
In my book, The Laughter Factor, I outline five ways of creating fun:
Surprise! – Delight people with the power of the unexpected.
Poke – Make fun of yourself and gently tease others.
In-Jokes – Discover the laughter in shared experiences.
Wordplay – Use witty language and clever banter.
Amplify – Exaggerate stories and situations for impact.
When you match your humour style to theirs, the feedback lands softer and the connection deepens.
3 Ways To Add Lightness To Performance Reviews
First, open with warmth. Start reviews with something positive or funny about a
mutual interest. It eases anxiety and signals partnership.
Next, laugh at yourself first. One manager started a review along these lines: “Before we get into our sales report, I want to say: I’m a walking economy. My hairline is in recession, and my stomach’s experiencing inflation.” Humour is a shortcut to trust. It lowers defenses too.
Third, stick to shared experiences. Reference things everyone in the office relates to — a recent win, a funny team moment, or even the construction cacophony outside your window. Performance reviews don’t need to feel like root canals. They can be honest, constructive, and even enjoyable when you bring a touch of feel-good funny to the process.
This starts even before the review. As a leader, you set the tone. No need for silly suits or juggling rubber chickens. But do create a culture that values humour, inclusion, and well-being. Are you creating a context where people feel free to laugh? When you have fun with your team, you make people more receptive to feedback, deepen trust, and strengthen culture. And when you learn to speak their “laugh language”, you can make evaluations feel like collaboration.
Tom De Vries, president emeritus of the Global Leadership Network, said: “When you delight your people, you deepen your influence.”
Adam Christing is a humour expert, keynote speaker, and the author of The Laughter Factor
